'Stone and Soil'

There's beauty in your facade.
you've trimmed yourself so well
and while below me you're far from
beneath; An open hand is met with solid resistance,
yet when I prod with just a finger
I find you're not as stable as you appear.
Treading gently seems the best advice.
So easy on the eyes I can barely take mine away,
though the dusting of red distracts occasionally.
Small pools of blue, crystal clear but icy-hard
offer no answers, despite the ripples
which show you're not as solid as the stony expressions
that dart across your landscape.
Too late I find I've brushed up against ivy,
and the itch is growing.
I grit my teeth, perhaps stop scratching. I pretend it's nothing
and really I suppose it is. You're nature-formed, so my catching this rash is certainly little more than a game to you -- you've
no more attention for me than a passing stormcloud.
Even a lush glade needs a little sting of rain to keep growing.
but that doesn't alter how real a small oasis of nature looks
after seeing nothing but the bland concrete jungle for so long.

Amber

sweet, with a kick
my kind of evening guest!
and a pitch neither too high
or too low, selective about
being heard. Smooth as ice
but pleasantly rough; to have your back
in the presence of newfound company
is a welcome quality- always helping
to find just the right words
for any situation, given some time.
The source of courage when I've
nothing to lose; the silent consoling
for every emotional or physical death.
I suffer otherwise alone. the liquid kiss
I've yet to find an equal to, holding my hand
when the only light is the glow of my laptop
and the streetlamp coming in the window.

Bella voce (older poem, found scrawled in a notebook)

I think the thing that hooked me
was the sound of your voice; a pitch
quite perfect and sweet, I could not help
but pick my jaw up off the ground
upon first hearing you sing.
You'll never know it but voice is
something I looked forward to hearing each night,
somewhere in a place I wouldn't admit.
I mean, sure. you've snagged plenty of sailors
with your siren's-song quality
but I won't let myself be dashed
on those rocks for hearing it.
I think I'll just tuck it away,
smile at the memory,
like a music box relic for a time when I'm old and greying.

Face

Take a deep breath
and step onstage
Deliver your lines command their focus!
But all the while
you can't help but
Look to the crowd gauging their eyes
as one falls asleep
two watch raptly
mouths set in stone seeking the end
an end for which
you've deja vu'd
a thousand nights before
make each night
their treat, not yours.
and when all's said
all bows taken
Peel your soul - for tomorrow night
it's a new dawn
And the post-show exit yields once more
a thousand strangers' faces.

nightfall

Silence is a stranger;
nothing sleeps around me. the floor
creaks, the cat darts about;
A lyric passes through my head,
the ghost of a chord whispers in my ear,
begging to be played aloud.
across the hall, the high whine of a television
pervades the wooden barriers,
the occasional blare of gunfire
emanating from a western film.
on the street, bottles break and
horns honk and garbage trucks grumble,
people plod along, voices come and go at all decibel levels,
people seem to be going somewhere, no matter the blindness of the inky darkness around them,
and ever so softly,
at the end of the street comes the rumble of the rails,
as the subway line rattles on,
just as restless and constant
as I feel right now.

I think I'm going to try and start writing again. See if I can't get something stirring. Possibly going to use this blog to post old and new writings (poetry and short stories). Does anyone even read this/ have any interest?

Theatre Sans Argent

sometimes, you have to cut the noose at the neckline in order to stop hanging yourself. Sure, you'll draw blood. But maybe a scar is better than a snapped neck. If you don't keep giving yourself yards of rope with which to hang yourself, you're far less likely to get it caught and *SNAP*.

Sometimes, it's good to say "I give up. I'm going to hurt, for a lot longer than I'll ever tell you or anyone face to face, but I'm through. And that's okay now".

Sometimes, you need to remember there's a candle, somewhere in the darkness. Maybe it's a candle you lit yourself, Maybe you haven't found it yet. maybe it's a lamp that's off in the distance, maybe it's one you keep so close to you that nobody else can see the light.

Sometimes, a new friend and a breath of fresh inspiration is all you need. That, and some liquor. And good stories over which to bond.

some good friends are my most treasured possession, and I am glad that I find them in new places, though I'm sad when I realize that I'm an ass for forcing others (in my mind) to fit into the category I so foolishly thought they belonged in, when I am simply not as important to those persons, no matter how close or not, and it's not fair to them to shoehorn them into my "ideal" friend position/level.

Sometimes, it's okay to say "I have nothing. I'm scared for what the future's going to throw at me, and I'm man enough to admit it now and then".

Sometimes, just sometimes, we are hanging on by nothing more than a thread. Dangling there, feet over nothing, no security beneath us and no aid above, we pray that the thread holds.

And sometimes?

some of the best things happen just before the thread snaps.

Rant and Review: where have all the good shows gone?

So, I've no idea if anyone cares to read this, but I'm posting in the interest of conversation.

I watched the pilot for a new show today, called VIRTUALITY. I've been hearing quite a bit of hype about it for the past month and was looking forward to its airing; the pilot would be extra-long and then hopefully if it got enough views the show would get picked up for a full season. It's penned by Ronald D. Moore, who most people don't even know but would recognize his handiwork in writing/producing for Star Trek: The Next Generation and its movie-spawn, ROSWELL and CARNIVALE, other great TV shows from awhile back, and more recently the new BATTLESTAR GALACTICA series.

the basic premise of VIRTUALITY is this: A crew has been formed to man a spaceship and is preparing for "Go or No Go" in regards to a mission to explore a new planet on the edge of a distant planetary system. The hook is, the entire thing is also being captured as a reality show. The mission's in effect because, as to be expected, we've abused our own planet's resources to the point where we need to start looking for alternatives. This new crew, of the space ship PHAETON, has something of a big-brother element to it, although the show itself acknowledges more about the crew than the drama portrayed. It doesn't shy from the questions raised by such a topic- namely the idea that elements of a "Reality" show are staged. Additionally the show (at least in this pilot) focuses a lot on the VR machines used by the crew for recreation- a virtual world one can escape to, vast as you want it to be and to any genre, time period, or style of life you wish. The program has its glitches though; early on we learn there's a bug in the system- a program glitch where an AI is actually killing the crew during their separate excursions, causing them to 'wake' from the VR feeling like they've just experienced it for real thanks to the advanced technology.

In spite of all this, it's a very realistic fiction show, not unlike what RDM did with Battlestar; the focus is not on how space-y things are, but rather how humans interact with each other when confined together for a long stretch of time. He writes dramatic tension well, and for those who've never picked up Battlestar Galactica, let me tell you that it's not your father's Sci-Fi show. BSG has more drama than science fiction. and while you never lose sight of the fact that you're on a ship, it doesn't overwhelm a good plot, good acting, and a solid story.





okay, that's the review part. now for the rant.


This show got crap ratings when it aired on friday. Can't say I'm surprised. It's the same thing that happened to The Sarah Connor Chronicles and Dollhouse (though Dollhouse managed to survive, thanks to DVR-viewings and online-viewings after episodes were released online). shows like this are fresh, they are solid-acted and well-written, and yet Terminator was, and I fear VIRTUALITY is, apparently doomed to fail. As are piles of shows that came before them. And not all are science fiction!

off the top of my head, the killed-too-soon list includes:

Freaks and Geeks.
Arrested Development.
Sports Night.
Deadwood.
Farscape.
Carnivale.
Twin Peaks.
Pushing Daisies.
Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip.
Journeyman.
Two Guys, a Girl, and a Pizza Place.
NewsRadio.
and FIREFLY of course. but that's a rant half of you already know and the other half don't want/need to hear.


few of these shows made it past the first season, but even those that did limped along with ratings for only two, three seasons at best. And yet, everything the critics could offer suggested that these shows are fantastic (most of the time. I won't deny the above list has its flaws here and there). The fault therefore must lie with the viewees and not the creator, yes?

So where has the public failed? Why are some shows, good as they are, ignored? I would set aside my geekdom pride and openly admit that it would be "Because It's Sci-Fi" any day if that were the case. But Arrested Development is far from Sci-Fi, and it's a bloody shame that it bit the bullet so early. No, I fear that somehow the public has opted to pick forms of entertainment that aren't so intellectually-based.

But hey, I mean, who needs thought-provoking when we can tune in to "WIPEOUT" to watch a bunch of people get knocked on their ass into murky, disgusting water? Or the ever-popular (for some absurd reason) "SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE"? Hell, most of us do think we can dance regardless of being right, why televise it for the world to judge mercilessly? Is there nothing with a storyline anymore? Does it all have to be Celebrity Cameos and Easy-to-Comprehend-While-Sitting-On-A-Co

uch? Why find a show that makes us uncomfortable but eager to discuss the questions raised, when we can watch a bunch of rich, obnoxious, spoiled teens have sex and cause absurdly unnecessary drama (something we've all dealt with for the past eight years in our own gorramn lives, and some continuing to suffer through thanks to the maturity of those around us) on one of those shows like OC or GOSSIP GIRL? I must confess I haven't seen the latter, but I stumbled on to WIPEOUT one night and was dumbstruck by how unsatisfying and brain-numbing it was.

Shows' fanbase can make or break, as supported by Jericho (briefly), Eli Stone, Family Guy, and Futurama (once again!). All of these shows have had such strong, vocal followings that they were revived and live on. Again supporting the idea that it's not just Execs trying to make money on a show, but that the audience has the Roman Thumb of Fate when these shows' backs are to the wall.

I can't quite comprehend it, and therefore at this stage I'm only left wondering when people will come around. And maybe I'm just not seeing everything. I mean, I know I'm not omniscient but I've always wondered this sort of thing when I come across shows only to find they ended after one to three seasons.

And so, I ask you:

What do your shows need to have in order to keep you interested, friends? What do you think the cause is for good shows getting the hook before their time? (and any other questions/thoughts I may have omitted due to my brain finally running out of steam).
Feel free to leave a comment. I'd seriously appreciate your thoughts on the topic.


and, for those who are curious, here's the pilot:

http://www.hulu.com/watch/80030/virtuality

do you ever have the distinct feeling that something is missing?

not like you've left the gas on or not, or that you're forgetting what you came into a room to do in the first place, but more like something important isn't there.

it rests somewhere around your gut, but branches out down your arms and just behind your navel.
Like, there's a... a hollowness that used to be filled in, or like you've just experienced the death of someone you knew, but nothing of the sort has actually happened.

it's not quite a grief, so much as you know inherently that you shouldn't be feeling like this and that off-putting feeling is rather empty and therefore depressing even though you can't fathom what's creating the feeling.

this has made a lot of people very angry, and has been widely regarded as a bad move.

In the beginning.... there was an apartment. It was the symbol of independence, and a representation of growth and maturity. It was a beginning, as well as the symbol of what had ended. Plus it was close to a subway line, which meant non-car living wasn't so hard.

and in that apartment, there was a dude.








and that dude finally decided it was time to keep in contact with other friends. He missed them from time to time and wanted to hang out them when the Powers That Be decided timing could allow for such. But since he couldn't all the time, he decided to find a way to keep them informed of his shenanigans, and as a way for him to find them to keep up on theirs.
And lo, there was a new Blog. and there was much blogging. sometimes. on rare occasions of remembering to.


welcome. step Outside the Asylum.